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I was on the treadmill this morning, and struggled terribly to catch my breath while running. In an attempt to distract myself, I turned the television on, plugged in my headphones, and started watching Kelly & Ryan. I usually don’t watch morning television, and today reminded me of why. Kelly Ripa is teeny tiny and perfectly toned. Viewers see her as having the “ideal body.” Ryan Seacrest appears to have a thin build, and muscular enough, also representing an “ideal body.” As someone who has suffered from a significant eating disorder, their conversation on national television was triggering, and I can only imagine how itRead More →

Konheim Mandras - Seeing Your Loved One Suffer

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Sad. Frustrated.  Helpless. Painful. The common answers I was given when asking my loved ones how they felt when I was struggling with an eating disorder. The scary thing… I have been on the other side. Where I’ve watched first-hand someone battle this disease. The feedback I received was consistent in the way I felt when I tried helping someone I loved.  I tried to do everything to help. I was willing to do anything. To open their eyes, and yell at them to, “Snap out of it!” I wrote letters, sent emails, called incessantly, begged them to change, pleaded for them to take stepsRead More →

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Though I recovered from my eating disorder thirteen years ago, there are still times where “the voice” reappears more than other times. One such time always happens to be during the holiday season. During the summertime, I am constantly outside, active, craving juicy fruits, and uninterested in heavier foods. I don’t fluctuate significantly, but there is no doubt I gain a few pounds each winter. With the days shorter and the weather colder, it’s much more difficult to get outside, enjoy additional walks, and be as active. Between my winter weight gain and inability to run around outside the house more, it is inevitable “theRead More →

Erin Konheim Blog Soccer

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As high school and college graduation pictures continue to appear on my newsfeed, I can’t help but reflect back to those exciting, yet terrifying times in my life. The exhilaration of being a senior, moving away from home, and establishing independence is remarkable. Parties, freedom, friends, and community celebrating for what seems like weeks. But, in due time, each student will begin packing and preparing for the next phase of life. An abrupt transition from confidence to uncertainty occurs, and anxiety subtly begins to set in. Regardless of one’s connection and relationship to home and family, moving out can be very scary and overwhelming. ForRead More →

Michigan State Dream

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“Wow. I never knew any of that,” said an assistant coach of one of the men’s athletic teams at Michigan State University following my speech. This coach happened to be a contemporary of mine. One who I actually have known since I was twelve years old. As I looked at him, and smiled, I thought, “Well, of course you didn’t know any of it.” Until Kick The Scale became established and publicized, the thought of anyone knowing I suffered from a psychological or physical disorder was horrifying. Why would I have wanted anyone to know I struggled, or needed anti-depressant medication, or that I evenRead More →

wentworth-miller-depression

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In a world of full of people, I never felt so alone. Eating disorders are complex. They often coexist with other physical and psychiatric disorders, such as anxiety, depression, obsessive behavior, or substance abuse problems. At the time I developed an eating disorder, I was, also, diagnosed with depression and obsessive compulsive disorder. I had not only lost a significant amount of weight, but I developed compulsive rituals connected to food, and was obsessed with calorie restriction and weighing myself. Depression plagued me. I was not consuming enough food to maintain a healthy body weight, and I was shameful of how sickly thin I appeared.Read More →

Erin Konheim Mandras

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It’s like signing up for a race, not really preparing or training for it, and setting out and finishing with an unbelievable time. If you don’t beat that time the next race, do you feel as accomplished? Or, it’s like setting a personal record in collections in one week’s time. The following week, if not matched or beaten, do you feel like a failure? For me, I have a tendency to set a goal, and once reached, anything less feels unfulfilling. According to Entrepreneur and Online Marketing Expert, Neil Patel, in Entrepreneur, “When we don’t get fulfillment, our psychological response is anxiety or tension.” Based on myRead More →

Erin Konheim Mandras Blog Eating Disorders

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We were waiting to hear back the results from my 14-month-old’s endoscopy. The pediatric gastroenterologist who was caring for and treating my son had us prepared for what she anticipated the biopsy would reveal. History The prior 14 months had been exhausting, challenging, and extremely difficult as a mother and parent. The issues we faced daily since his birth included spitting up, vomiting, difficulty bottle feeding, and then refusal to eat solid foods at the time we were instructed to introduce them. Though he had struggled to initially gain weight, he somehow made it out of the “red,” and his growth became a nonissue. TheRead More →

sports-illustrated-three-covers

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Sports Illustrated Made Monumental Statement; but, it is not the answer. I have often dreamed of.. …having long, skinny legs. …not having my inner thighs touch. …fitting in a size double zero. …owning long, wavy hair. …being sized in a double “D” bra. …possessing a flat stomach. …having narrow shoulders. …having zero fat on my body. When I think of a Hollywood “model” and “beauty,” I think of all the above qualities. The standard of beauty has been illustrated in a way where, as a society, we all have the same vision of beauty and of the perfect body. As somebody who suffered terribly fromRead More →