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My phone rang tonight, and I pulled it out to see who it was, and it was a very close friend. She was calling at an odd time, so something about that made me answer (admittedly, I ignore phone calls too many times). Before I got a word out, she blurted out, “I’m on the way to the hospital. I am bleeding.” She is just over ten weeks pregnant. And, it brought back so many vivid memories of pregnancy… of which I somehow survived three of them. Trust me. I do see it from the perspective of someone who may be struggling with infertility. ThatRead More →

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So I walked into the gym this morning, as usual. Like every morning, I threw on the same black crop pants that I wore the day before, washed, cleaned, folded and ready to go. On top, I wore my raggedy gray v-neck t-shirt that is in a rotation with the same one, but blue. Let’s just say, it probably doesn’t smell like perfume. If people looked at me, which I’m sure they did, they have to assume I only have one or two pairs of workout pants, and two t-shirts, at most.  To those people who are concerned about the variety in my wardrobe, my husbandRead More →

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“Let’s go on a diet,” my best friend suggested after we gained an unhealthy amount of weight in college. Something had changed. Buttoning my pants started becoming an exercise in itself, and I noticed this sound, “swish swish,” that was following me everywhere. It ended up being chub rub, otherwise known as my inner thighs rubbing together every time I took a step. Quickly, I declared, too, that I needed to go on a NONE-OF-MY-PANTS-FIT diet. To this day, when I hear the word “diet,” I immediately think of a structured attempt to lose weight. Though the reasons for dieting vary, the desired outcome is the same.Read More →

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On the first warm day of third grade, everyone wore shorts. All the girls in my class were excited to show off their new summer outfits, denim shorts and colored tank tops.  Dark complected, with dark features, I was aware that I had an unusual amount of body hair. My arms and legs were clearly hairier than everyone else’s–boys and girls. Scared that I would be made fun of at school, I opted to wear pants and long sleeves until the heat was no longer bearable.  The bell rang, and it was time for recess. My first day wearing shorts for the season, I wanderedRead More →

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Striving For The Ideal Body Can Result In Permanent Damage. It did for this reporter. I was a teenager, and my body was going through some major maturation changes. I seemed to take longer than most of my friends. You know, when it came to getting my first period and developing a “chest.” In fact, I had been made fun of by boys about my flat chest. “If you blindfolded me, I wouldn’t know which was your chest or which was your back,” was a line I vividly remember hearing on the school bus. As if I wasn’t insecure enough as a middle-schooler. Then, IRead More →

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There is a reason Purim occurs right before Passover on the calendar. Megillah readings, costumes, carnivals, games, and hamantaschen put smiles on faces and enjoyment in the eyes of observers. It is one of the most joyous and fun holidays Jews celebrate. Then comes Passover…a very important holiday with tremendous historical significance as Jews celebrate their freedom from slavery in Egypt thousands of years ago. However, the anxiety I feel leading up to Passover is real, as there are very strict laws and customs that we must follow as Jews; and, these rules are based around food. Matzo, the traditional unleavened cracker of fiber-free whiteRead More →

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The pressure I felt as an athlete began even at the young age of five. I played forward on my team, and my job was to score goals. If I didn’t score goals, then I believed I failed, or didn’t meet expectations. I didn’t even need a coach to put pressure me–I put it on myself. When a coach did, it became double whammy. And, how long could I go before I hit a breaking point and was no longer able to bear pressure in a healthy manner? “GET ON THE LINE,” were the famous words my teammates and I heard throughout our entire  soccer careers.Read More →

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It’s one thing having to deal with school functions, sporting events, and birthdays. But, as each holiday we observe nears, my anxiety level skyrockets. Growing up as a kid, nobody had food allergies. At least that’s how it seemed. The popular lunch sandwich sent to school was peanut butter and jelly, and birthday cakes were birthday cakes. None of this gluten free or nut free stuff. My only worry when traveling on an airplane was getting to our destination on-time and smoothly. Now, it’s whether or not my child will die from peanut exposure or ingestion.  We went to Tigers games, Pistons games, and RedRead More →

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Muggsy Bogues Spud Webb Pele Lionel Messi Floyd Mayweather Jr. Yogi Berra Emmitt Smith Barry Sanders These were names I heard throughout my entire life, particularly when it came to playing soccer. It all started when I had a private training session with a professional coach. I was twelve years old at the time, and I can recall the exact racquetball court we were working in, focusing on the technical side of the game. She had bleached blonde hair, and in my eyes, was amazing. I idolized her, and I only dreamed of being just like her one day.  I worked my ass off inRead More →

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It breaks my heart, and makes me so sad. More than anything, I’m embarrassed and ashamed.  I was initially drawn to the sport of soccer because my brother played. From there, it was clear very early on that I had potential. Of course, I enjoyed the sport, loved to win, hated to lose, aspired to score goals, and was determined to standout. I was driven and motivated by my individual performance. My mood was dictated by how well I thought I played, and how well my dad believed I performed–even from the young age of five. His affirmation meant the world to me. When itRead More →